I remember being about ten years old and wanting to be a teacher, but I have a feeling, that's not when it started.
I remember wanting to run a play school like the one I was sent to - a second home.
I remember wanting to drop science, but still teach in grade five.
I remember dropping the idea of teaching literature and contemplating computers instead in great eleven.
But through it all, I remember that I've always wanted to teach.
I remember someone once close to me asking me what I'd like to be when I grow up, and to my response of 'a teacher', told me that I would change as I grew up. Either they were wrong, or quite possibly, I haven't grown since then, but the wanting to teach hasn't changed much.
Two days ago, someone described what I do as a state of 'being' as opposed to a state of 'doing'. And, that is where I must begin.
Teaching has become what I've come to see as my calling, and for this, I have distinct reasons, which I shall not bore people with at the moment. But all the same, I have been led to teach over time and over multiple spaces.
It is a state of 'being' for me, as was aptly put, I think. I do not know what I would do if I wasn't to teach. I do not know who I would have been, if I had wanted something else. Although, I did have the choice that many people seem to feel devoid of. Yet, despite it all, I love that I am and that I do.
I remember a little origami flower I received a few years ago. That was my first ever teacher's day gift, with a little note that held lots of love.
I remember smiling faces and flowers that have been presents over the past the years, and am thankful.
Today was a day that was unlike any other day. It was a day that my students reminded me how special they are, and how much I am loved. It is humbling.
Over the past week, I have been shooed out of class rooms and halls, while students practiced their routines and songs for today. It showed me their care and compassion. It showed me their love.
Today, I was shooed out once again, and then welcomed in with great honor and excitement, to a note on the board and lovely students presenting me with things that mean so much more than what they are at face value. It is an overwhelming moment of emotion to walk into.
Watching routines come to life, having tasks handed out that aren't quite so simple, and seeing the joy on faces as you willingly participate, though hesitant, in things that make you severely uncomfortable.
To come home to a card from my first and most favorite, is cause for an exuberant overflow of joy to embellish what has otherwise been a splendid day in itself.
Teaching is not walking into a classroom to be the boss. It is not knowing what to do all the time. There is so much more to it, and I am constantly learning from my students just as I hope that they may be learning from me.
It is a challenge. It requires a lot of time, effort, patience, and most of the other fruit of the spirit. But it has never been anything less than worthwhile.
I am blessed. I am grateful. I am a teacher.