Water's edge

The water’s edge is a strange place to be in the midst of the storm. I can feel the wind rising, but its call is but an echo in my ears. The rain has been battering against the window panes, but even that is only the sound of chimes in the air. My thoughts are louder, now, than all that is around me. I do not wish to go back. There is an escape within these waves. The storm is brewing, but I am still here. It cannot move me.

My eyes are closed, but my other senses tell me all that happens around me. The chill of the rain as it caresses my skin, the cold water that hugs my feet, the wind that bites the warmth out of me with a brutality that seeks to cause pain. The ebb, the flow, the howl, it is all but music, orchestrated like chaos. The scent and taste of salt in my hair and on my lips, draw memories into my vision. I can’t tell which ones I’d want to let go of, even if I could.

There is nowhere I have felt safer, and yet, there is nowhere more dangerous that I have been to as yet. My strength fades. I fall to the ground. There is no part of me that is not soaked to the bone, as the sea smiles in victory.  And yet, it is in the darkness of the storm, that I feel the most empowered. It is in the riot of the wind that the calm surrounds me.  

And it is amidst this assault on my senses that I feel his arms around me. I do not need to be in control. Relief washes over me as I realize that he’s found me. The storm rages ever more so, but it cannot tell whether my tears are my own or that of the rain. But I am safe as I hear him whispering in my ear, ‘I’ll always be here.’

Blood and Water.

"So this is a post that I've been trying to make for the past 3 or 4 days..."

      That was the starting line of a post that never got written... And now I'm back in that square wondering why I can't seem to write about what I want to say :\ I even started a small passage in my journal about the same, because apparently it's something I really want to talk about. Okay, so to clue you in on what I'm talking about, have you ever heard the saying, "Blood is thicker than water"? Umm, well, apparently it's a metaphor or something saying that family ties will always be stronger than anything else. And you know what, I agree, but I don't believe that my family is limited to the bloodline I come from.
     You see, I have some people in my life, who are as special to me as anyone in my family has ever been. And that's saying something because I'm yet to know someone who is as fond of their cousins as mine are of each other :)

     And now its been another few days since I restarted the post and the only thing that still makes sense is the title for me.

      See, life is going to throw so many things at me. It wants to knock me down. It wants me to feel like there is no point in anything; like my very existence is pure crap. I won't let it. Because I know that I have a beautiful Creator, who chose me. He made me because He had a plan for me. And no, I'm not saying I'm going to be rich and famous or anything of the sort. I'm saying, that because He loves me, I'll be fine no matter what happens. And I'm so sure because it's when I doubt this that I fall; that I feel like my world could just disintegrate.
     And the thing is, most of the time, I have friends who remind me of this and that's what helps pull me back up. And that is what I believe family is. This support system that God gives us, that we have to draw closer to Him and remind us of His love for us. He tells us that He'll never leave us alone and even if we choose not to remember He's there and lean on Him, He'll give us people to support us.

     So, I don't quite appreciate it when people mock me for who I am, or for my wanting to spend time with my friends over someone I'm related to for the mere fact that "blood is thicker than water". Point is, I don't agree with you. I think each person matters to one another in different ways, and some ties are bonds forever and others are created. But that will never mean the ones created cannot be stronger than the ones that exist by birth.

     I think I managed to sort of get how I feel out right there but not quite sure if its right... But perhaps, it's time to give this post a rest and hope that if I've not said what I want to say in the way it should be said, then it will happen some other day :)

STAY BLESSED. <3